WINTER DUDE ALLOWANCE

This week has been a bit of a mad one, had murder with the baby's dad this week over one thing and another and so I went mad and basically broadcast a load of his deep dark secrets all over the place. That couple with the Andy terrorisation I have established myself as queen of the ex girlfriends from hell. I have decided I will continue to terrorise Andy until it stops becoming hillarious as it is not just basically an excuse for me and my mates to have a laugh. We did another corker this week but I don't want to write about it on here yet because I have got a sneaky feeling he reads this blog and I don't want to spoil the surprise for him but lets just say that boy is going to rue the day he ever slagged off my son and I think he's pretty much going to have to change his number and move house to get away from my deluge of terror that I have implemented. Cunt

Because the week was so mad and I had spent it being extra angry with one prick and another I decided a few orgasms where the order of the day, so I rang up the old flame who I have now decided I am recycling again and although we couldn't actually get out to have a proper fuck due to childcare etc we had a cyber shag over the skype and it was boss. Cyber shagging is underated. Your guarunteed an orgasm because ur doing all the moves but at the same time its totally hot and plus you get to feel that naughty just been fucked feeling especialy if you are shagging someone your not really supposed to be.

Question. If you have a boyfriend and you cyber shag someone over skype is that cheating?

Its not for me, its for a friend. HA!

Right so the old flame is back on, naughty naughty, have half arranged a fuck date for Tuesday or Wednesday BUT heres the thing I have been asked out on a date on Tuesday and now my brother wants to see me on Wednesday because its my birthday on Friday and he is away then so what do I do? Can't fuck my brother off because birthday dinner with the fambo is tradtion, do I swerve the date and go with the guarunteed fuck OR do I swerve the fuck and go on the date??? I think I'm gonna swerve the fuck and go on the date to be honest. The fuck will probably still be there after the date. God its COMPLICATED being single sometimes and having to juggle all your dudes I don't know how full time players manage it. Mind you saying that I have only met 3 what I would consider to be genuine bona fide full time players and they were all unemployed. Mad isn't it hahaha.

The little boy child disappeared for a week or two...well actually I think I got distracted by pictures of the old flames cock and forgot to return his messages but he's back texting me again now. He's jobless and skint and I said I refused to shag him unless we went for a drink first because I can't remember much about him and well that drink has never materialised.What the fuck does he keep texting me for if he's not interested in getting down to it what does he think I am a fucking penpal? Experience tells me he's probably got a bird and only texts me when he's bored. Well thats fair enough as I only speak to him when I'm bored too but if that's the case lay your cards on the table from the outset and get on with making me cum. For fucks sake. Amateurs. He's got till the end of the month to knob me or he's getting crossed off the books.

Oilriggers all over it with the texts too harping on about wanting to meet up halfway between Liverpool and London for a shag and asking me when I'm next down in London, see its hard really because he could see I was down in London regularly and was always asking to see me and I was always making excuses because I was actually down there seeing Andy you know how it is, now I'm thinking I should have made my excuses to Andy one night and gone and seen the oilrigger at least I would have had a decent shag but you don't do ya when your in good girl mode. Note to self never get in good girl mode its shit. I'll have to make a special trip to see him I suppose. If I get proper in need of a decent fuck and I have exhausted all my options then I'l go and see him but be arsed with the virgin pendalino otherwise. It wouldn't be so bad if he was in central London but he's out in the sticks proper south east London its a pain to get to in fact Id probably have to drive which is vile.

Right who else is there, oh god yes sexy sex on the beach Robbie and I had a little heart to heart on Saturday night while we were both twisted texting saying I was never far from his thoughts and maybe we could try and give it a go. Don't tempt me sexy sex on the beach Robbie, I would drop everything and be there in an instant but he's happy living in Spain and while I don't mind long distance relationships I think I plane commute is taking the piss a bit. Why can't he just move to Liverpool haha!! He's amazing you know, best sex ever and also just a really really nice guy thats fit as fuck and has a look of danger in his eyes. He really would be perfect for me. Fucking stupid bastard Spain.

I've applied to be a honey trap girl and all. Basically what it is is women pay you to go and try and seduce their husbands to see if they will cheat or not. Seems like easy money to me. Might even start webcaming too after my skype sesh last week because I'm fucking boss at it, its money for old rope and I'm skint. IMAGINE!! Remember I said the dude in work had asked me out? Well he failed to impress me with his sintillating conversation so he's been swerved. I think he's gutted but I can't arsed wasting time on people not giving me the fanny gallops I've got a busy life.

Right that's all for now, not really got much to say but had 3 different people message me today saying they were turkeyin for a blog so ya gotta keep the kids happy haven't ya. Gonna go and have a glass of wine now its almost 3.30pm x